Saturday, October 9, 2010

Sir Marjorie Lambshank III, Esq.

I would like to have a word with you concerning my name.

But first, hello! Welcome to my blog. My name is Marjorie, what is yours? How are you today? Good? Good.

Now, about my nomenclature. I will go over each part in the order it was given me. First, I would like to mention that I am a man. Or rather, I am not a man, but of the male persuasion; that is to say, I am a male cat. Do not be confused by the feminine name. It was given to me to "mellow me out" as it were, since I was in the habit of taking swipes at not only little children who took a liking to me, but the parents of said children and the staff of the bookstore as well. The Sir was put in place to distinguish me from other, more female cats and humans named Marjorie, of which I would like to point out there are few, and to hint at the fact that I am indeed a male cat. My surname Lambshank was thought up by Rebekah as a potential first name, but was voted "off the island" (or should it be "off the bookstore"?) in favor of Marjorie for the reasons I have just mentioned. It was, however, liked enough to be kept on as my last name. What the employees who gave me this name didn't realize, however, that my surname was already Lambshank, my first name already Marjorie, and that is where the III comes in. Yes, I am Sir Marjorie Lambshank the Third, my father was the Second, and his father the First. Lambshank a very known and respected name in high cat society, you see. The name Marjorie also has its roots in upperclass cat communities, and is considered one of the most regal cat names of the present day and age. My father was very fond of British social rankings, and thus titled himself Esquire, much preferring that to Mister, or Doctor. I would also like to mention, as a closing note, that I am a legitimate Sir. I was knighted by the cat Queen Elizabeth XVIII on November 23rd, 2007, a little over a year before arriving at the Community Bookstore.

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